I need a ruling on this

Post by **DigitalGypsy66** » Tue Sep 17, 2024 9:11 am

We had to do some of that with my parents' stuff last year. Just because they owned/made it doesn't mean it has any sentimental value to me. We actively do not accumulate crap that needs to be dusted, cleaned, maintained, etc. unless it is useful to us at the time. Like c21 said, help your wife's family move it, sell it, etc., but you are under no obligation to take it home.

NTA.

Post by **meecrofilm** » Tue Sep 17, 2024 9:20 am

DigitalGypsy66 wrote: ↑Tue Sep 17, 2024 9:11 am We had to do some of that with my parents' stuff last year. Just because they owned/made it doesn't mean it has any sentimental value to me.

Yeah, there's a line you need to find between sentimental keepsake and junk accumulation. People's legacies aren't every item they've ever used/made. You're not "throwing out your _____" when you get rid of an item.

Post by **mikey** » Tue Sep 17, 2024 9:40 am

Yeah, I'm with c2i here. You don't have to double bird them and go, "tough dick, dumb sh*ts" but you also can gracefully bow out of that situation because it's a senseless transaction for you to be on the receiving end of...

Post by **MrKennethTKangaroo** » Tue Sep 17, 2024 9:44 am

Honestly the challenge here isn’t how to get rid of stuff that no one needs. The challenge is being diplomatic about it

Post by **shoeshine boy** » Tue Sep 17, 2024 9:57 am

no need to take it if you won't use it and don't want it. suggest to the cousin that she sell it locally and if she wants to honor the dad, donate the cash to his favorite charity.

Post by **RonnieFranchise** » Tue Sep 17, 2024 9:57 am

MrKennethTKangaroo wrote: ↑Tue Sep 17, 2024 9:44 am Honestly the challenge here isn’t how to get rid of stuff that no one needs. The challenge is being diplomatic about it

It is, but it's also helping my wife to grow a pair (not literally) and say, we'll help find it a home or whatever needs to be done, rather than getting bullied into being the one that takes it. Because at this point her stance is- well my older and younger sisters don't want it, guess that means you need to find a place for it.

Post by **nocera** » Tue Sep 17, 2024 10:12 am

Throw it up on Facebook Market Place for free and it'll be gone within a day or two.

Post by **Shyster** » Tue Sep 17, 2024 2:37 pm

Agree with KTK that the challenge is being diplomatic. I certainly agree that there is no obligation to take something that you have no room or use for.

As an aside, I wouldn't view a gun cabinet as a viable storage option for actual guns. Guns are valuable and belong in safes.

Post by **tifosi77** » Tue Sep 17, 2024 3:43 pm

If it's wood can it be reclaimed and fashioned into something less gun-y that you can use?

Post by **dodint** » Tue Sep 17, 2024 5:04 pm

Toothpicks?

Post by **Shyster** » Tue Sep 17, 2024 5:14 pm

My grandfather had a gun cabinet where my mother had the gun-rack part taken out and shelves put inside to make it a book case.

Post by **dodint** » Tue Sep 17, 2024 5:19 pm

After the boat accident I presume.

Post by **Shyster** » Tue Sep 17, 2024 5:41 pm

After she bought a big safe for the guns. I don't know where she found it, but she bought an old standalone bank safe that once belonged to the First National Bank of Conneaut or something like that. It's basically built into that house now because it had it moved in during renovations when the walls were open, and I don't think it would fit through the door to get back out.

Post by **RonnieFranchise** » Tue Sep 17, 2024 6:59 pm

FiL got wind of it and solved the issue. “Why would Ronnie want it. He doesn’t have guns. Tell her to give it to someone who can use it!”

Boom.

Post by **RonnieFranchise** » Mon Oct 07, 2024 4:35 pm

The diamond fell out of Mrs. F’s engagement ring. It was my grandmother’s, then my Mom’s, and if my son ever gets married it would go to his wife. She is devastated. I feel like I should be angry but other than she probably could take it to a jeweler periodically to get it checked out, and we could have insured it, what could she have done?

We will look for it, it’s in one of three rooms in the house, the driveway, the car, her work parking lot, or her office. It could have gone in the trash or down the drain. Hit the floor and bounced under something. Finding it seems unlikely. It’s a relatively tiny little valuable rock.

I feel like I should be angry because in addition to the value it’s an important family heirloom. But there’s nobody to be angry with, right?

Post by **nocera** » Mon Oct 07, 2024 4:45 pm

Seems like this falls under the umbrella of "sh*t happens."

Post by **RonnieFranchise** » Mon Oct 07, 2024 4:48 pm

nocera wrote: ↑Mon Oct 07, 2024 4:45 pm Seems like this falls under the umbrella of "sh*t happens."

Yep. Expensive **** happens.

Post by **count2infinity** » Mon Oct 07, 2024 4:49 pm

It's a pretty rock that only has value because we assign value to it.

Family heirloom or not, I don't see any reason to be worked up about it. I wouldn't be upset, let alone angry. And your wife is probably already beating herself up over it. Replace it with a lab grown diamond or a moissanite and move on.

Post by **nocera** » Mon Oct 07, 2024 4:51 pm

You can be bummed that it's lost while not being mad at anybody. It's nobody's fault. I understand being upset as it clearly is important to you, but unfortunately expensive **** does happen.

Post by **RonnieFranchise** » Mon Oct 07, 2024 7:08 pm

Diamond found, in her lunch bag

Post by **AuthorTony** » Mon Oct 07, 2024 7:09 pm

RonnieFranchise wrote: ↑Mon Oct 07, 2024 7:08 pm Diamond found, in her lunch bag

That's great to hear!

Post by **Nuge** » Mon Oct 07, 2024 7:15 pm

Crisis averted. The next step is the stomach and you can take it from there…

Post by **count2infinity** » Mon Oct 07, 2024 7:43 pm

Nice. It’s still just a rock. But it’s your rock. Glad you found it.

Post by **RonnieFranchise** » Mon Oct 07, 2024 7:58 pm

She wants to keep it locked up and get an emerald. I was like…. Did you plan this?

Wrong thing to say

Post by **dodint** » Mon Oct 07, 2024 9:01 pm