Honeymoon Cost vs. Engagement Ring Cost

Postby **tifosi77** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 12:52 pm

@skullman80, that sounds like a hoot!

Postby **skullman80** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 12:58 pm

@skullman80, that sounds like a hoot!

It was a good time.

I told my wife when we were planning the wedding that I had 3 things I wanted and she could do whatever else she wanted to do. The first was I didnt want to wear a tux(I hate dressing up). She thought of the beach theme so that took care of that problem. 2. I wanted to be introduced to the Pens theme song.. She loves hockey so that was easy.(I tried to get us introduced to For Whom the Bell Tolls but she drew the line there lol) 3. I wanted to dance to Nothing Else Matters by Metallica for our first dance. She was cool with that. I was like .. I knew I asked you to marry me for a reason haha. I basically let her do whatever else she wanted with other stuff, but we kept within out budget and did lots of things ourselves.. IE. Invitations etc. It was honestly a great time. Everyone had fun.

The whole justin beiber thing.. I knew as soon as my buddy got up to request a song for me it was either going to be Justin Beiber or Cotton Eye Joe as he knows my disdain for both of those things haha.

Postby **tifosi77** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 1:11 pm

We got married aboard the Queen Mary, and our theme was Hollywood glam. All our table cards were headshots of actors ('you will be seated at the Lauren Bacall table'), fun stuff. For the cocktail hour, the music was mostly big band, swing, proto-rock music from the 40s and 50s; a lot of it was music that I acquired when I worked at EMI-Capitol, so it was deep catalog goodness. We made our entrance to the intro from 'Thunderstruck', and our first dance was 'Everlong' (acoustic); I had quoted the opening line when I proposed, so the song has sentimental value. (And if I ever run into Dave Grohl around town, I'm going to give him a big hug)

The final hour of the reception we called 'The Hour Of Rock', and it was nothing but hard rock and metal for the diehards who were still there. AC/DC, Foos, Van Halen, STP, Motley, Pantera....... we had a good time with it. But I'm so anal, that I actually programmed the setlist so the outro of one song would blend musically with the intro of the next song. Like the key changes were proper modulations and sht. Whhooooooo, yeah.

Postby **Panther** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 1:11 pm

Thanks for all of the input and subsequent entertainment!

Sounds like we are doing something similar to @dodint
We are doing an OBX wedding and renting a big beach house for a week with our close families and parties (~50 people), and then we are having a reception in the burgh a month later.

Unfortunately, that reception is blowing up in size and cost and looks like it will be $23-25k for 180 people. Fortunately, our parents are splitting the costs (we'd never do something that big on our own).
I started the honeymoon search looking at Bora Bora and Tahiti/Moorea, but those end up being ~$8,000, half of which is the flights. And 24 hours of travel each direction is a major timesuck. Currently looking at AI Resorts in the Dominican which come in at under half that figure.

Anyone have suggestions or tips for All Inclusives in the Carrib?

Postby **shmenguin** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 1:26 pm

honeymoon-wise....i feel like you can go to a beach resort any time - even with kids. go have an adventure. your days are numbered for that.

Postby **blackjack68** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 1:30 pm

honeymoon-wise....i feel like you can go to a beach resort any time - even with kids. go have an adventure. your days are numbered for that.

Damn, I'm agreeing with you twice in one day?

Postby **mac5155** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 1:34 pm

The more I think about it weddings annoy the crap out of me. It's a lose lose money wise. Not to mention my wife is in a friend's wedding and this weekend is the bridal shower. So she's paying for the shower, going in on a gift with the other bridesmaids, and buying her own gift. Seriously, shouldn't the bridal shower BE THE only gift?

Postby **count2infinity** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 1:37 pm

I was overwhelmed with the amount of gifts we received from the bridal shower. That and my mother-in-law paid for and organized the entire thing for my wife. It was incredible, and then at the wedding we got mostly cash, which was awesome as well.

Postby **grunthy** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 1:38 pm

The more I think about it weddings annoy the crap out of me. It's a lose lose money wise. Not to mention my wife is in a friend's wedding and this weekend is the bridal shower. So she's paying for the shower, going in on a gift with the other bridesmaids, and buying her own gift. Seriously, shouldn't the bridal shower BE THE only gift?

The bride and family is spending hundreds of dollars per guest, so it shouldn't be since the point of wedding showers and bridal showers are to get gifts for the upcoming marriage.

Postby **mac5155** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 1:43 pm

The more I think about it weddings annoy the crap out of me. It's a lose lose money wise. Not to mention my wife is in a friend's wedding and this weekend is the bridal shower. So she's paying for the shower, going in on a gift with the other bridesmaids, and buying her own gift. Seriously, shouldn't the bridal shower BE THE only gift?

The bride and family is spending hundreds of dollars per guest, so it shouldn't be since the point of wedding showers and bridal showers are to get gifts for the upcoming marriage.

But when you're paying for the shower, should you be obliged to get a gift too? Let's see - she said it'd be around $500 for the shower + shower gifts. $200 for the bridesmaid dress. $150 for the bachelorette party. We'll give a $100 gift, and we're gonna need 2 nights of a hotel for the wedding, so there's another $250. So she's shelling out over a grand for a friend's wedding.

Postby **count2infinity** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 1:47 pm

We went out of our way to make sure our wedding didn't cost our families and friends much at all to attend. My wife's maid of honor got spoiled with our wedding as she was in a wedding the next summer where it was in Disney World and the amount of money she had to spend just to attend the wedding was ridiculous. If your wife (or you) weren't comfortable spending that much money, maybe you or she should have said something.

Postby **skullman80** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 1:49 pm

We were under 9k for 120 people for our wedding. That included Booze, food(buffet style), setup, cleanup etc. We also had the reception and wedding in the same place(Wife and I didn't get married in a church).

We set a budget and stuck to it, cause we knew neither of our families could afford to put out 20k or whatever for a wedding. I mean if yo have the money by all means, but I'd rather save some money for a honeymoon or down payment on a house which is what happened.

Postby **grunthy** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 2:00 pm

We were under 9k for 120 people for our wedding. That included Booze, food(buffet style), setup, cleanup etc. We also had the reception and wedding in the same place(Wife and I didn't get married in a church).

We set a budget and stuck to it, cause we knew neither of our families could afford to put out 20k or whatever for a wedding. I mean if yo have the money by all means, but I'd rather save some money for a honeymoon or down payment on a house which is what happened.

The booze and rehearsal are going to cost 9k for mine.

Postby **LITT** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 2:09 pm

we are going on 2 honeymoons. altogether (flights, hotels, etc etc), it will be about .9 : 1.0 for ring: honeymoon.

Postby **Panther** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 2:10 pm

We were under 9k for 120 people for our wedding. That included Booze, food(buffet style), setup, cleanup etc. We also had the reception and wedding in the same place(Wife and I didn't get married in a church).

We set a budget and stuck to it, cause we knew neither of our families could afford to put out 20k or whatever for a wedding. I mean if yo have the money by all means, but I'd rather save some money for a honeymoon or down payment on a house which is what happened.

We are beyond fortunate to already have the house down payment out of the way (did 20%). I would rather put all that money into savings, though. If I had my way, I'd cut it down from 180 to 120 and it would be in a fire hall with pizza and lots of booze.

Postby **skullman80** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 2:20 pm

We were under 9k for 120 people for our wedding. That included Booze, food(buffet style), setup, cleanup etc. We also had the reception and wedding in the same place(Wife and I didn't get married in a church).

We set a budget and stuck to it, cause we knew neither of our families could afford to put out 20k or whatever for a wedding. I mean if yo have the money by all means, but I'd rather save some money for a honeymoon or down payment on a house which is what happened.

The booze and rehearsal are going to cost 9k for mine.

That's just crazy to me, but if you have the cash then why not I guess.

Our rehearsal dinner was having everyone over to my future mother in laws house and having pizza and beer.

Postby **tifosi77** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 2:21 pm

Our rehearsal dinner was at Buca di Beppo

Postby **DigitalGypsy66** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 2:23 pm

Also, we're going to a wedding this weekend. My wife's coworker. My wife went to her shower in May, and gave her a gift from the registry there. Are we obligated to give another gift? I say yes, my wife says no. What says FAF?
yes. and it should be cash.
And the card should read, "Enjoy the bread maker!"

It's really funny - it's my wife's co-worker, and she doesn't want to get her anything else. I said "You're the one that will have work with her for the next 20 years...!" That seemed to straighten her out...

Postby **shafnutz05** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 2:35 pm

Our rehearsal dinner was at Buca di Beppo

Uno's here...and everyone had fun, so whatever

Postby **Silentom** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 2:41 pm

North Park Clubhouse here. It was a blasty blast!

Postby **mac5155** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 5:31 pm

Ours was at pechins /fayettenam

Postby **RonnieFranchise** » Tue Jul 14, 2015 6:29 pm

Dutch Haven Restaurant, Lock Haven, PA

Reception was at the Elks. People still talk about the debauchery 19 years later. Sometimes it's best to go cheaper and have people feel like they can let their hair down.

My Grandma's diamond gets handed down to the oldest son so I got lucky there too.

Postby **King Colby** » Wed Jul 15, 2015 7:26 pm

Ring was about 5,000 (appraised at 8500 - family connects!).

Honeymoon will probably be about 5,000 all in, which includes only airfare, taxes/fees, and shore excursions on our Hawaiian Cruise that was gifted to us through a family member's timeshare points.

So about 1:1 thanks to family hookups.

Postby **King Colby** » Wed Jul 15, 2015 7:27 pm

Thanks for all of the input and subsequent entertainment!

Sounds like we are doing something similar to @dodint
We are doing an OBX wedding and renting a big beach house for a week with our close families and parties (~50 people), and then we are having a reception in the burgh a month later.

Unfortunately, that reception is blowing up in size and cost and looks like it will be $23-25k for 180 people. Fortunately, our parents are splitting the costs (we'd never do something that big on our own).
I started the honeymoon search looking at Bora Bora and Tahiti/Moorea, but those end up being ~$8,000, half of which is the flights. And 24 hours of travel each direction is a major timesuck. Currently looking at AI Resorts in the Dominican which come in at under half that figure.

Anyone have suggestions or tips for All Inclusives in the Carrib?

I have heard that Punta Cana is excellent and not all that expensive.

Postby **Reveutopique** » Wed Jul 15, 2015 8:08 pm

Emotionally stable and well put together adults realize that the ring is a symbol meant more to impress others than as any sort of tangible statement between the proposor and proposee. A diamond ring is literally the core of a #2 pencil with a mountain's worth of pressure applied to it and set into a metal band. Big woop.

The honeymoon will provide you a lifetime of memories and be a permanent marker of how important your relationship is. Also, you are not ever in your lifetime going to lose your honeymoon down the kitchen sink.

For the curious, our honeymoon cost about 12x what all three of our rings cost, combined. (Engagement, two wedding bands)
"emotionally stable and well put together adults"...ha. you want to go there? because if we start to dissect the actual value of what we all spend out money on, the tif man may not come up smelling like roses.

It's just his personal opinion.
I don't think he was trying to single anyone out.

Also, I just want to add that diamonds are plentiful and are only a rare gem by name, not presence.

They are pretty I guess. I wish I had stuck to my original plan to get a jade engagement ring (which I may or may not have showed Kaiser a year before we even met) but jade breaks easily.

We haven't been on a honeymoon but according to my dream honeymoon it would be about 5kish?
But that honeymoon involves Paris and a bedroom and coffee plus dinner maybe.

That is double the amount of our rings, one of which is a family heirloom and was free for us.