Fifth Avenue Forum

I have a hard time struggling with the concept that grandparents think things can continue to being the same when children are in the picture. When it's two adults kidless, sure, I see reasoning. As soon as the baby comes into the picture - ain't no way.

We're struggling with that this year, made even more difficult as we make it an emphasis to incorporate more of my wife's culture and holiday traditions into our lives while my parents have oddly starting treating every holiday like a random Tuesday in April despite finally having grandkids to dote on. We host, I cook, and we're the ones with little kids, yet they're intent on defining who is "gift eligible", what the meal should be, and when things take place since we live all of an hour away and they need to get home with the dogs. Couple that with my wife's general postpartum state of longing for more time with her family, culture, and customs, I'll be taking the kids to my parents on the 26th for a quick visit while hopefully the ensuing 12 months is enough time for them to get the stick out of their asses and un-bah humbug themselves.

This gets to the point where "Parenting Thread" is no longer the correct topic, but over the past year I've grown tired of being made to feel like my focus in life needs to be what's best for my family AND what's best for my parents, instead of prioritizing our nuclear family.

No matter what is said. You prioritize your unit. There's a good speech out there from someone that said parents who are well adjusted understand that when kids go off and start their families - they're along for the ride, and no longer the driver.

We do gifts at our house and probably hang out until just before lunch or so, then we go to my parents' house, where everyone gathers.

We do this too and it's really nice. Nowhere to be until about 4pm.

Last year we started inviting my mother in law over for breakfast. She's a bigtime holiday ruiner - forced us to either come to her shitty house that barely fits herself on actual christmas day or else not celebrate with her at all. So we chose the latter and didn't celebrate Christmas with her for a few years. So in the end it worked out for us and my wife looks like the Ace lol

Once we had our first kid, we stopped traveling on Christmas. We’re at our house and anyone that wants to see us can come here. Christmas Eve we’ll go to my parents (same town). The 26th we go to my in-laws (out of town). Same thing every year.

Same, we said look, anyone who wants to come here is welcome but we aren’t leaving home on Christmas. We’re on Year 23 of that philosophy.

Now that we have grown kids (no grandkids), we’re on the side of- when are you coming for Christmas? Since my oldest is single again it’s less of a problem, but when they went to his gf’s parents and we didn’t get to see him for Christmas, it was hard.

We’re also still in the mode of having to figure out when to see my parents 4 hours away. With my Dad’s Alzheimer’s I don’t think they’ll be able to come back here. I think we may be out to MLK day between my son’s schedule and Mrs. F’s car having issues. It’s hard but just have to do what we can.

Kid was in a mood this morning.

“Why do I have to wake up when it’s still night time outside?!?” … I agree kid. I agree.

“Why are you still in pjs, dad?”
“Because I don’t have to work today.”
“So you’re going to stay home while I have to go to school???”
“Yeah…”
“That’s not fair!!!!”

So your kids had school all week? Mine went Monday and Tuesday and are now off until January 2nd. Our old school district switched to a year round schedule, so they got out last Friday and go back January 3rd or something. Kind of all over the place.

Kid was in a mood this morning.

“Why do I have to wake up when it’s still night time outside?!?” … I agree kid. I agree.

“Why are you still in pjs, dad?”
“Because I don’t have to work today.”
“So you’re going to stay home while I have to go to school???”
“Yeah…”
“That’s not fair!!!!”

This is a daily fight in my house too lol. But dad you wear sweat pants and a hoodie every day I don't want to wear a jacket

Same around here everyone seemed to be done wed or thurs at the latest. No buses around today at all.

.

Half day today, no school until 1/2.

Our last day was yesterday. Go back the 2nd

I think today is pretty much just a slack off day at school, but yeah. They have today. Then off until the 3rd.

my kids got out early on Wednesday and are off until the 8th (!!)

Asked kids what they want for Christmas dinner.

Pot roast.

But we make that once a month or so, don't you want something special?

It's our favorite!

Well it's my favorite too! So pot roast it is!

Speaking of grandparents frustration... I am with my in laws and I have told them that I do not want certain types of toys for him. Namely, big plastic things that make noise. The particular sound used with these toys triggers my bad headaches and we have limited space in the apartment so large toys are just not feasible. And he gets overwhelmed if the noise is on.

Yet again and again they get these things for him. And get pissed if I suggest they keep them at their house for him. It's like 1) listen to his parents, 2) pay attention to what he does with these toys and 3) take one look around you at my apartment to see the types of things we buy for him.

Just place them in storage when you get home. And by storage, I mean donate them.

My son who goes to half day kindergarten had half of a half day today (?) Got on the bus at 815 and off at 1015 haha

Why do these red states care so much about what they teach in school when the kids are never in school?

Although I’m glad my kids are in school today. More free time for me to get stuff done.

Kid was in a mood this morning.

“Why do I have to wake up when it’s still night time outside?!?” … I agree kid. I agree.

“Why are you still in pjs, dad?”
“Because I don’t have to work today.”
“So you’re going to stay home while I have to go to school???”
“Yeah…”
“That’s not fair!!!!”

This is a daily fight in my house too lol. But dad you wear sweat pants and a hoodie every day I don't want to wear a jacket

Our fight is always about my oldest wearing shorts to school. Buddy, it’s 20F outside, wear some pants.

Just place them in storage when you get home. And by storage, I mean donate them.

They have gone through our closets to find the gifts they gave him that I didn't want him to use when they watched him one time.

Our last day was last Friday. Go back1/2.

Why do these red states care so much about what they teach in school when the kids are never in school?

Although I’m glad my kids are in school today. More free time for me to get stuff done.

Beat me to it.

Kid was in a mood this morning.

“Why do I have to wake up when it’s still night time outside?!?” … I agree kid. I agree.

“Why are you still in pjs, dad?”
“Because I don’t have to work today.”
“So you’re going to stay home while I have to go to school???”
“Yeah…”
“That’s not fair!!!!”

This is a daily fight in my house too lol. But dad you wear sweat pants and a hoodie every day I don't want to wear a jacket

Our fight is always about my oldest wearing shorts to school. Buddy, it’s 20F outside, wear some pants.

I don't believe my oldest wore long pants once when he was in middle or high school. We quit fighting the battle. Freeze your ass off for all I care.

I’m also a proud member of Team Shorts, you candyasses.

I had a sensitivity to non-soft pants (sweats are good, jeans or dress pants drove me nuts) as well as anything tight at my neck and forearms. I wouldn’t break out in a rash or anything, I just could never be comfortable.

I’ve grown out of it, but I too was all shorts all the time as a kid.