5AF Parenting Thread

[obhave]

Yeah, and as if the miscarriage wasn't bad enough, the procedure they have to do afterwards is not enjoyable. My wife was in a bad place for a little while there. Definitely made me both appreciate my daughter that much more, and have more empathy for anyone who went through the same thing.

My first pregnancy resulted in a pregnancy loss at 10 weeks. The worst part for me wasn't the procedure, it was the rounds of pills they gave me to try first. That was painful, I was miserably sick, and they didn't work (they had me try 3 times). The procedure was a relief tbh after that. If I miscarry again, I'm going right to the procedure.

The process did make me want to change my obgyn. She is amazing, but her nurse practitioner was the one who told me I had a missed miscarriage. She just came into the room, said I miscarried, told me I had 3 options for next steps and left the room. It was like 2 min and I got absolutely no advice or heads-up about what the process would be like.

The thing that helped me was that it was likely chromosome issues, and that would have been a very hard life for the child. It still hits sometimes, usually each time I discover I am not pregnant again. I got pregnant so quick our first time trying (first month) now I have very unrealistic expectations.

[Beveridge]

Yeah, and as if the miscarriage wasn't bad enough, the procedure they have to do afterwards is not enjoyable. My wife was in a bad place for a little while there. Definitely made me both appreciate my daughter that much more, and have more empathy for anyone who went through the same thing.

My first pregnancy resulted in a pregnancy loss at 10 weeks. The worst part for me wasn't the procedure, it was the rounds of pills they gave me to try first. That was painful, I was miserably sick, and they didn't work (they had me try 3 times). The procedure was a relief tbh after that. If I miscarry again, I'm going right to the procedure.

The process did make me want to change my obgyn. She is amazing, but her nurse practitioner was the one who told me I had a missed miscarriage. She just came into the room, said I miscarried, told me I had 3 options for next steps and left the room. It was like 2 min and I got absolutely no advice or heads-up about what the process would be like.

The thing that helped me was that it was likely chromosome issues, and that would have been a very hard life for the child. It still hits sometimes, usually each time I discover I am not pregnant again. I got pregnant so quick our first time trying (first month) now I have very unrealistic expectations.

We got pregnant in our first month too. Took about six months once we started trying again and got pregnant basically one year after we got pregnant the first time. Hopefully it happens fast for you. Taking a bit that second time made it hard for sure.

[Nuge]

I'm disheartened and surprised to see how common this is here. Our son happened pretty quickly as well. We've lost two pregnancies since him and it's been tough. One was ectopic and the other was at 12 weeks. I think we're going to take one more shot at it and if it doesn't work again, we'll give up. .

[NTP66]

Yeah, and as if the miscarriage wasn't bad enough, the procedure they have to do afterwards is not enjoyable. My wife was in a bad place for a little while there. Definitely made me both appreciate my daughter that much more, and have more empathy for anyone who went through the same thing.

My first pregnancy resulted in a pregnancy loss at 10 weeks. The worst part for me wasn't the procedure, it was the rounds of pills they gave me to try first. That was painful, I was miserably sick, and they didn't work (they had me try 3 times). The procedure was a relief tbh after that. If I miscarry again, I'm going right to the procedure.

The process did make me want to change my obgyn. She is amazing, but her nurse practitioner was the one who told me I had a missed miscarriage. She just came into the room, said I miscarried, told me I had 3 options for next steps and left the room. It was like 2 min and I got absolutely no advice or heads-up about what the process would be like.

The thing that helped me was that it was likely chromosome issues, and that would have been a very hard life for the child. It still hits sometimes, usually each time I discover I am not pregnant again. I got pregnant so quick our first time trying (first month) now I have very unrealistic expectations.

I wouldn't blame you for switching at all. We found out at the hospital, as her OB sent her there for more testing. I feel awful because I was on a train home from work when she was dealing with all of the doctors, and by the time I got to her at the hospital, I knew what happened once I walked into the room. I don't even remember how far along she was, but it was definitely far enough where we had told family.

[mac5155]

Wife has PCOS and it took like 2 years for the first one taking several different fertility treatments. We thought it'd be the same on baby 2 and it just happened naturally. We weren't doing anything to prevent it, but didn't need any encouragement either

[NTP66]

My wife and I saw a fertility specialist when we were trying, after it just wasn’t happening. Both of us were totally normal with everything, so we enrolled in a fertility study, where you’d randomly be selected for a treatment option. My wife hates - hates - needles, and wanted to avoid clomid at all costs. We got clomid. So on top of all of this stress, I had to give her injections with this huge **** needle, right in the butt cheek. Thinking about all of this now reminds me of how stressful all of it was, including the long wait until our daughter arrived.

[mac5155]

Pretty sure that's what my wife took too. I didn't need to inject it though, if that's what you mean

[NTP66]

She had to herself the clomid injection in her lower stomach, IIRC. The stuff I had to give her was something related to ovulation? I honestly don’t recall now.

[NTP66]

Just looked it up - the trigger shot, hCG.

[mac5155]

Bedtime with a toddler is going to be the death of me.

[DigitalGypsy66]

Develop a nightly routine. Tough during the holidays, potentially, but that's how we survived toddlerdom.

[mac5155]

Oh we have the routine. From 7-8, Bath, snack, one episode of something, milk, brush teeth, then bed. Its just once we get in bed we remember 20 things we needed to do, we want to try new blankets, rearrange ornaments on the tree, make sure every household member has an assigned stuffed animal, etc etc lol.

[NTP66]

My daughter is the world leader in bedtime delays, and always has been. Gotta pee. Need a drink of water. Want the pillow from the other room.

[meow]

One word: melatonin

[mac5155]

Hm. Never really thought of that. Is it a gummy you give them?

[meow]

Yes. We do like two or three days of it then take a week off. It really helps kind of re-calibrate bedtime. Our 7 year old is going to be one of those adults that can function on like four hours of sleep so it helps him settle and get to sleep

[robbiestoupe]

We had friends over for Thanksgiving and they have 5 year old twins. They slept in the same room as our 5 and 8 year old. It was amazing to me how different their bedtime routine was to ours. They basically go in to say goodnight to their kids and let them roam around and put themselves to sleep. We have a multi-step routine for every night, and the kids are asleep within 10 minutes of us leaving the room.

[NTP66]

One word: melatonin

I wish this worked for me, but it simply doesn't.

[King Colby]

My 4 year old did the whole song and dance at bedtime from about age 2-3. Even with melatonin there were many stall tactics but once he got fully potty trained and grew up a little it ended. Now it's literally pee, brush teeth, get a cup of water, tuck him in. If i time it right I can do it during a TV timeout.

My 1 year old... from about 3 months on he has preferred to just be dropped in his crib and left alone. It's unreal. No wind down time whatsoever.

[mac5155]

I think the worst part is he always wants us to lay with him, which I guess I don't complain about because it won't be like this for long but then it just prolongs the process. I guess it's not hard. It just takes forever once we get to the final step lol

[shafnutz05]

Yes. We do like two or three days of it then take a week off. It really helps kind of re-calibrate bedtime. Our 7 year old is going to be one of those adults that can function on like four hours of sleep so it helps him settle and get to sleep

This is exactly what we do. We coincide the melatonin nights with our date nights.

[mac5155]

Hey now.

[count2infinity]

One word: marijuana…

[shafnutz05]

Since daylight savings ended, I've been up with my two year old anywhere between 530-630. Today, he didn't wake up until 9:05, was acting weird, had breakfast, and then vomited about two quarts of milk, yogurt, and
Scrambled eggs into my lap right after I got dressed to go usher at church .

I was able to trap it all to keep it from running into the chair. Fun morning. He seems better now.

[NTP66]

Pretty sure he was sending you a message about being forced to attend church…