5AF Parenting Thread

eddy
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5AF Parenting Thread

Postby eddy » Thu Dec 03, 2020 11:49 am

Will never talk bad about Santa to me kids. If they don't believe, then I guess he won't be bringing them their one unwrapped gift he does every year. Don't care if they are 20 or 30 or however. I still don't know how he does it. I will throw the elf on the shelf into Santa's sleigh engine if I ever get the chance. Rumor has it, he will be showing up tomorrow with a Mando shirt on and baby yoda legos, I guess we'll see.

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5AF Parenting Thread

Postby shafnutz05 » Thu Dec 03, 2020 12:25 pm

Gr8 discussion. Yeah honestly the thought of older kids being mean to my daughter about Santa is enough to make a grown man cry.

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Postby count2infinity » Thu Dec 03, 2020 12:35 pm

I wanted no Santa, my wife wants a toned down Santa, so we compromised and went with a toned down Santa. Kiddo is 2.5 and she doesn't really have a concept of Santa that I'm aware of just yet. Next year will likely be the be the test.

I hated Santa when I was growing up and was sooooo happy when I found out he wasn't real.

We also had the discussion last night as to what to do for a 2.5 year old as far as gifts. She's got pretty much everything she could ever want already, but we figured on one toy and some clothes and books that she can open Christmas morning will be fun.

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Postby RonnieFranchise » Thu Dec 03, 2020 12:42 pm

Our school district has been providing free meals for all kids under the age of 18 throughout the pandemic. I haven't actually taken advantage of this because I figured it was really meant for the more needy students. I'm running out of ideas for my daughter, and am thinking about just grabbing meals half of the week. Should I not?
Our initial thought upon seeing people we know to be making 6 figures+ and still fully paid being thankful for free school lunches (delivered) on FB was what colossal dadholes they were for taking advantage when they weren't "needy." As we thought about it more- I mean my kids are old enough to make their own lunches during virtual school but how the eff would I do it on an all day meeting day if they were 11 and 7 instead of 17 and 13? Mrs. F is essential and out of the house most days- yeah free delivered lunches would be a colossal help. I say do it.

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Postby DigitalGypsy66 » Thu Dec 03, 2020 1:22 pm

We also got EBT cards for each kid worth $330. You aren't allowed to donate or give the card to someone else, so we've been using the $660 for odds and ends groceries. It's been great.
How's that? We were able to donate ours.
I suppose you could just give them to someone, but the notification letter says not to do that. You do have to call and set the cards up, and they may have asked for identifying information.

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Postby Gabe » Thu Dec 03, 2020 1:32 pm

Jumping in on the Santa thing...

We made a point never to indulge in the Santa story with our kids. Overall, I've tried to be as honest as possible with them, and even if sounds like this is a fun, trivial matter, I didn't want to mislead them. I know, "I bet your fun at parties" I struggled with that, for sure, but I think about how I interact with my late teenagers now, and I think we can most of the time have open and honest conversations about a wide variety of tough topics. But, there's sometimes the little voice, saying what was the harm. One of those parental things that there's no great answer to, I guess.

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Postby count2infinity » Thu Dec 03, 2020 1:37 pm

I think at the end of the day, we're not going to force the Santa idea down her throat, and if she were to ask me "is Santa real?" There's no way I'm going to lie to her. As with most things parenting, I'm gonna play it by ear and deal with it when it gets here.

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Postby eddy » Thu Dec 03, 2020 1:39 pm

My parents to this day never told me it was them or he isn't real and I don't plan on changing that for mine, because as far as I'm concerned, he is. That never led to any strange communication or anything, hell I was always honest to the point where I'd call from a party in a bad situation, hiding from cops in someone's back yard doing something dumb, ate too many hallucinogens, whatever. You gotta believe though

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Postby NTP66 » Thu Dec 03, 2020 1:39 pm

I never thought the Santa thing was ever a big deal. My daughter will eventually find out on her own by discovering hidden presents from 'Santa', and we'll move on. Same as I did when I was a kid. For now, she enjoys it, so we roll with it.

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Postby eddy » Thu Dec 03, 2020 1:42 pm

My daughter is 13 and its been brought up before. You believe and get presents or can be a dick (like some of her friends) and not. Up to you.

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Postby count2infinity » Thu Dec 03, 2020 1:49 pm

I never thought the Santa thing was ever a big deal. My daughter will eventually find out on her own by discovering hidden presents from 'Santa', and we'll move on. Same as I did when I was a kid. For now, she enjoys it, so we roll with it.
I think I've told this story before, but it may bear repeating... I sort of figured out Santa wasn't real in 1st or 2nd grade on my own. We're told if you're good you get presents.. LOTS AND LOTS of presents. If you're bad you don't or you get lumps of coal. We sat down for class after the holiday and the teacher had us all go around the room and tell the class what Santa brought us for christmas. "Hmmm... that dickhead kid who is constantly sent to the principal's office got video games and awesome toys. I never get in trouble. I do what I'm told... I got socks. What gives?" Then when you sort of do the math, ya realize it just doesn't add up. Now looking back on it, rich kids got lots of awesome toys for Christmas, poor kids didn't. Had nothing to do with naughty and nice.

I don't know if it did any psychological damage to me (well... any more so than other things may have as a kid), but I do remember hating it. If my kid digs it, fine. But like I said, I won't lie to her about it.

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Postby Freddy Rumsen » Thu Dec 03, 2020 1:53 pm

I know I am a monster but I never did the Santa thing (or the Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy) with my kids. No trips to the mall, no pics, none of it.

Only thing I told them was don't tell other kids Santa isn't real. That's not friendly or nice.

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Postby eddy » Thu Dec 03, 2020 1:53 pm

Stop making me feel bad. Must exit this thread.

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Postby NTP66 » Thu Dec 03, 2020 1:54 pm

Source of the post I got socks
This is what I tell my wife to get me every Christmas, because I don't want anything else. :lol:

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Postby count2infinity » Thu Dec 03, 2020 1:56 pm

Oh man... today, socks and underwear are the best. But as a kid.

Image

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Postby NTP66 » Thu Dec 03, 2020 1:57 pm

Just the other day I told my daughter that I got coal in my stocking once because I was so bad at school that year. What do you think is the first thing I overhear her saying in her Zoom meeting when school started this morning? :lol:

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Postby robbiestoupe » Thu Dec 03, 2020 4:17 pm

I leaned towards no Santa, wife was all about it so I let it go. My 7 year old has asked me the past 2-3 years, "Is Santa really real?". I've never straight up lied, but also haven't given him a straight answer. I told my wife this year is the year. It's too much. Because after skirting the question, he'll go off spewing a bunch of "facts" about Santa.

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Postby skullman80 » Thu Dec 03, 2020 4:24 pm

I don't have kids but I couldn't imagine having a kid in middle school or almost in middle school not knowing santa isn't real. That is bananas to me. I feel like I found out by 4th grade or at the latest, probably earlier.

Note: This is why I don't have children.

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Postby NTP66 » Thu Dec 03, 2020 4:55 pm

I don't have kids but I couldn't imagine having a kid in middle school or almost in middle school not knowing santa isn't real. That is bananas to me. I feel like I found out by 4th grade or at the latest, probably earlier.

Note: This is why I don't have children.
That’s an odd reason to not have kids. :lol: No way I’d let this go on to middle school. I’m telling my daughter while she’s in elementary school if she doesn’t figure it out first.

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Postby King Colby » Thu Dec 03, 2020 6:14 pm

I was late figuring it out. 4th or 5th grade i think. Never said a word about it to my parents. This will be my 3 yo's first year understanding it. He's pumped. The excitement is really cool, couldn't deprive him of that even for a fantasy

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Postby MWB » Thu Dec 03, 2020 7:49 pm

I’ve always found Christmas a magical time of year, for lack of a better word. Santa, for me, is part of that. Eventually I figured it out, and it didn’t take anything away from me. Same for my daughters. I think it was a part of the season that made it a little more special. Even after knowing the reality, there’s still that little fantasy that I find neat.

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Postby NTP66 » Thu Dec 03, 2020 7:51 pm

That feeling can be replaced once you start making your own homemade eggnog from scratch. :lol:

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Postby King Colby » Thu Dec 03, 2020 9:44 pm

Were any of yinz guys big pre-Christmas present cheaters? My wife was... she would always find the presents in the house before Christmas. I never wanted to do that and ruin my own surprise

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Postby MWB » Thu Dec 03, 2020 10:17 pm

I would look, but didn’t want it spoiled. So I would try to find bags that contained gifts, but just feel the bag rather than look inside the bag. I wanted a clue, but didn’t want to completely ruined.

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Postby eddy » Fri Dec 04, 2020 7:00 am

I don't have kids but I couldn't imagine having a kid in middle school or almost in middle school not knowing santa isn't real. That is bananas to me. I feel like I found out by 4th grade or at the latest, probably earlier.

Note: This is why I don't have children.
That’s an odd reason to not have kids. :lol: No way I’d let this go on to middle school. I’m telling my daughter while she’s in elementary school if she doesn’t figure it out first.
They all know, but there's a part of them that doesn't want to let it go. Who am I to force that onto them. Well, I guess I'm their parent, but still.

I'm in a bit of new territory this year as all 3 of my kids wrote a note to Santa last night saying they want him to give their gift to someone who needs it more than them...

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