Fifth Avenue Forum

Posted: **Mon Apr 20, 2020 9:24 am**

So sorry to hear about Cadence. It's always hard to feel like you've picked the right time, and so often you feel like you could have gotten another week or that. I'm glad Cadence gave you a pretty clear sign that now was the time, while still being able to enjoy your last good days together.

I made a collage of pictures of Flurry and it still hangs above where her kennel sat. Over two years later we've finally transitioned to finding black Roscoe hairballs instead of her brown ones. Every time I'd clean under the couch I'd be on the brink of tears. But, they weren't always sadness. It was sad to not have her with us anymore, but it was a reminder of the fun we'd had, and all the grief (really, gnawing the sides of the cabinets?) and pleasure we had. There's nothing juvenile about keeping her clydesdale along for your journey. It's a very heartfelt tribute to a beautiful girl.

Posted: **Mon Apr 20, 2020 9:28 am**

We've joked for a long time that she can never leave us. She had a short hair JRT coat that shed constantly. We will find white hairs for years, even after we move. Every time I deployed overseas I would have her hairs in my sleeping bag and clothes the whole year.

Posted: **Mon Apr 20, 2020 2:11 pm**

Re the stuffed Clydesdale

We still have Carlin's leash and collar hanging on the coat rack at the front door. And we always will.

Our other girl, Lily, is abnormally sheddy for a beagle. I get amused when she follows me around while I Swiff the house, because I'll clear a part of the floor, and she'll be walking two steps behind me freshly carpeting the thing.

Posted: **Mon Apr 27, 2020 9:38 am**

Anyone have any insight on how to deal with separation anxiety (at least that is what I think we're dealing with) in a puppy.

It manifests most unbearably in that if she isn't sleeping in the bedroom with us, she just starts crying and making some of the worst noises imaginable. The sleeping on the flood in our room is mostly fine, except she gets up and rustles around at ridiculous hours and also makes lip smacking noises at random intervals.

Posted: **Mon Apr 27, 2020 10:16 am**

Have you tried the old tshirt method, one that has you or your wife's scent?

Posted: **Mon Apr 27, 2020 10:36 am**

The best thing (and probably the only right thing) we did with Murphy when we got him as an 8 week old puppy was crate train him to sleep at night. The first few nights he did what you are describing, but we just ignored it and rode it out. Within a week he started sleeping through the night mostly with no issues.

Now he knows when it's bed time and he looks forward to going in his crate and runs to go in it when he knows we are going to bed. It's basically a safe zone for him. The crate has always been in our bedroom. We did keep a shirt in there with our scent on it the first week or two. Now he has a specific blanket he keeps in there.

He still gets to come up on our bed when we take him out in the morning and lay with us, but there is no way the way he spreads out that he can sleep in our bed at night with us. My wife and I would never get any sleep if he did.

Posted: **Mon Apr 27, 2020 11:03 am**

Yeah, we tried the crate for a week, she stayed up every night crying non stop, we just gave up out of fear the neighbors would call the police, her crying sounded like someone being murdered. And we also read that they can hurt themselves by wailing nonstop like that.

Posted: **Mon Apr 27, 2020 12:05 pm**

Crate training can take 3 or 4 weeks, easily.

Posted: **Mon Apr 27, 2020 12:39 pm**

Some dogs take to crate training really well. Some don't. Puppies are all about consistency. Figure out what you want to happen and stick to it for a month then reassess

Posted: **Mon Apr 27, 2020 12:53 pm**

I guess my issue is that I don't need her to sleep in the crate, and is there not really any daylight between the separation anxiety and the crate?

Posted: **Mon Apr 27, 2020 1:02 pm**

We used one of these with our puppy.

https://www.petco.com/shop/en/petcostor ... al-aid-toy

Not once did he not make it through the night. Parents have been using the same for their puppy and it’s also worked like a charm.

Posted: **Mon Apr 27, 2020 1:05 pm**

Yeah, we got a heartbeat lamb. that didn't help.

When we leave, we try to lure her into the crate with a peanut butter kong. Not only does that do nothing, she ignore it the whole time we are gone,and then the older guy goes in and swipes it when we get home and let her out of the crate. Point being, she **** hates the crate.

Posted: **Mon Apr 27, 2020 1:30 pm**

We couldn't crate train our Aussie. I don't know exactly what it was other than "this dog can't be crate trained" so we pivoted to life with a non-crate trained dog.

Posted: **Mon Apr 27, 2020 1:35 pm**

Does she go into the crate for any other reason? If she is only associating the crate as something she goes in when you leave then I could see an issue. You have to make her associate it with good things.

Every dog is different, puppies can be a royal PITA. We got lucky with Murphy that we were able to block him in our kitchen with a baby gate that he couldn't get over when he was a puppy and didn't have to crate him when were at work. I was also WFH alot during that time.

As soon as he was old enough we got him to go to doggy day care 2 or 3 days a week and he was able to run free. He still goes there to this day. It's a few hundred bucks a month, but it works for him (and us). He also went to puppy classes that helped as well (I think).

Since he was able to get all that energy out we were able to start trusting him at home not being blocked in the kitchen. It took a while though. We started with leaving him out for an hour, then two hours, then three hours etc. It was a process, a long process. It was very stressful, and I had to talk my wife out of wanting to return him to the rescue. We worked through it though and he is now an awesome dog.

When I look back on it now, the first 3-6 months with Murphy were really stressful, it was probably near when he turned 1 that he really started to settle down. Routine is key. Same thing ever day as much as possible. Over and over and over and over.

Posted: **Mon Apr 27, 2020 1:41 pm**

Does she go into the crate for any other reason? If she is only associating the crate as something she goes in when you leave then I could see an issue. You have to make her associate it with good things.

Every dog is different, puppies can be a royal PITA. We got lucky with Murphy that we were able to block him in our kitchen with a baby gate that he couldn't get over when he was a puppy and didn't have to crate him when were at work. I was also WFH alot during that time.

As soon as he was old enough we got him to go to doggy day care 2 or 3 days a week and he was able to run free. He still goes there to this day. It's a few hundred bucks a month, but it works for him (and us). He also went to puppy classes that helped as well (I think).

Since he was able to get all that energy out we were able to start trusting him at home not being blocked in the kitchen. It took a while though. We started with leaving him out for an hour, then two hours, then three hours etc. It was a process, a long process. It was very stressful, and I had to talk my wife out of wanting to return him to the rescue. We worked through it though and he is now an awesome dog.

When I look back on it now, the first 3-6 months with Murphy were really stressful, it was probably near when he turned 1 that he really started to settle down. Routine is key. Same thing ever day as much as possible. Over and over and over and over.

ATM, she is pretty much only in the crate when we leave, if we put her there she just makes devil sounds, even if I'm just sitting there next to her in the crate.

I am ok giving up on the crate, but I am just "researching" to appease the other half.

Just trying to get to the point where she can have free reign of the house like our other dog.

Posted: **Mon Apr 27, 2020 1:47 pm**

Sounds like the crate is not going to happen....Can you baby gate him in a room like we did with Murphy in our kitchen?

Not sure if your dog is big on chewing things or what not. It's going to take some time, and you will probably want to pull your hair out, but patience is key. Gotta try to figure out what triggers the reaction and that is tough.

Posted: **Mon Apr 27, 2020 1:56 pm**

Thanks, she doesn't seem like a chewer right now. When left to her own devices, she basically just goes to the foyer to pluck shoes off the rack and takes them on the couch, then just kind of mouths them.

It seems really for us, the only issue is bed time. The other night we tried to just shut our door and give her free reign of the house. She was fine for like 20 minutes just laying outside the door, then started crying and yelling.

Willing to explore sedatives.

Posted: **Mon Apr 27, 2020 4:42 pm**

I double down on what Skullzy said about putting her in the crate when you don't go out so she begins associating it with good things. Dogs are naturally denning animals, but they are also pack animals. So you have to approach it from both aspects and play to their instincts.

Put her in there, keep the door open, lay down in front of the crate, play with her with her favorite chew toys, give her treats until she pukes, the works. Just make sure you leave the gate open as you work on positive reinforcement. Gradually, close the gate, but leave it unlatched and stay in front of her. Then after that, get up on the couch where she can still see you with the gate still unlatched. Then go to other rooms for a few minutes, etc, and ultimately latch the gate. Just be deliberate and consistent with how you step up in separation.

It's frustrating and can be a little emotionally stressful - for you - but it's a good idea to crate train imo.

Posted: **Tue Apr 28, 2020 10:07 am**

Arnold might be the most genuinely happy person in the world.

Posted: **Tue Apr 28, 2020 1:33 pm**

My in-laws dog escaped yesterday and still haven't found him. They had a person replacing stonework in their backyard and the dumbass opened all the gates while the dog was outside. It is a two level property, so he shouldn't have even opened the top gates where the dog was because he wasn't even working in that area or needing to go there.

Posted: **Tue Apr 28, 2020 1:43 pm**

Never underestimate the daftness of the average person.

We had some piece of furniture delivered somewhat recently and the guys had to come in and out through the back. For whatever reason when they left they didn't close the gate behind them. Later that day when the dog was out I went out and saw that he was just standing there staring at the open gate. If a dog walked by when he was outside, there was a 100% chance he would have ran out and I would have had no clue.

Posted: **Tue Apr 28, 2020 4:35 pm**

Posted: **Sun May 17, 2020 7:21 pm**

Per her breeding, my younger 2 year old cocker spaniel is a dedicated birder. She’s good too. Three since last Monday, which of course she tries to bring in the house to help provide for us. Mrs. Franchise flipped which- I get there’s a dead bird on the kitchen floor but she’s just doing what she does. Technically you are supposed to praise her because that’s her role in the pack.

Mama bunny made the tactical error of birthing babies in our fenced in backyard. Pup got 2 of 5, we saved the other 3. Hopefully mama does not abandon them.

Her older brother is 6 and fortunately has pretty much has no interest in such activities.

Posted: **Sun May 17, 2020 7:48 pm**

Our 21 year old cat’s health has gone downhill a little recently. She has a very noticeable limp, and when she is getting up from laying in your lap or something, often stumbles. I try and carry her up and down the stairs when I know that’s where she’s headed, but she still makes those trips on her own. Our daughter is really attached to her, and I hope she still manages to go on another few years.

Posted: **Sun May 17, 2020 8:16 pm**

A 25 year old cat. Hmmm.

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