2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

willeyeam
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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby willeyeam » Wed Apr 17, 2019 12:58 pm

We need a poll for 'weirdest takes by a poster on this board.' Contestants so far are:

dodint's hate for Letang
Morkle's hate for Simon
Jim's hate for Malkin
shmenguin's desire to watch bdsm-on-ice
Any of LBL's hockey opinions
dodint's hate for Murray's glove hand too
funny because the rest of the league loves it

shmenguin
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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby shmenguin » Wed Apr 17, 2019 12:59 pm

I had to google BDSM.

But after this series, it’s not like my take is looking worse. The one-sided application of wedgies in this series was hammered home last night. Guentzel getting the business by a scrub player was one thing. But later, Barzal made a play on net after the whistle, Bjugstad skates towards him, Barzal says “what” In a “frat boy dancing with your girlfriend and not giving a ****” fashion. And then Jugs just silently mopes away in the other direction. No word if horny was picking a fight with a hot dog vendor while this was happening.

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby Morkle » Wed Apr 17, 2019 12:59 pm

It's probably more accurate to say Michael Scott is obsessed with Ryan because he actually emulates Ryan and tries to relate everything back to Ryan, rather than Toby.

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby Morkle » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:02 pm

I had to google BDSM.

But after this series, it’s not like my take is looking worse. The one-sided application of wedgies in this series was hammered home last night. Guentzel getting the business by a scrub player was one thing. But later, Barzal made a play on net after the whistle, Bjugstad skates towards him, Barzal says “what” In a “frat boy dancing with your girlfriend and not giving a ****” fashion. And then Jugs just silently mopes away in the other direction. No word if horny was picking a fight with a hot dog vendor while this was happening.
Imagine if this team had a player like Ryan Reaves.

mikey
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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby mikey » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:05 pm

I had to google BDSM.
*unzips*?

Trip McNeely
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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby Trip McNeely » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:33 pm

If the Pens decide to move on from Hornqy (which I doubt), they should really look at Anders Lee. Not sure how much he’s gonna demand and he is 29, but he doesn’t have the tread on his tires like Hornquist does

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby mikey » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:36 pm

Lee is looking at getting his salary at least doubled if he wants...I don't think that's really a fit for us in our situation...

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby Trip McNeely » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:36 pm

Also, does anyone know what’s going on with Jordy Bellerive? Not sure how much he has progressed this year

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby mikey » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:38 pm

Would y'all trade Kessel for Christian Fischer and 14th overall?

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby Dickie Dunn » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:39 pm

We need a poll for 'weirdest takes by a poster on this board.' Contestants so far are:

dodint's hate for Letang
Morkle's hate for Simon
Jim's hate for Malkin
shmenguin's desire to watch bdsm-on-ice
Any of LBL's hockey opinions
It's DD and Morkle who can't go two posts without mentioning Simon, so that should be a combo job...and then that gives it enough "Michael Scott's obsession with Toby" feel to it to make it the clear winner...

dodint and shmenguin's respective takes are at least fairly well explained and justifiable...they also aren't as, I don't know, cringey...Jim doesn't obsess, so I'm cool with it...

But I can't imagine having someone so innocuous and ubiquitous living so rent-free in my head as to generate that "Simon will get a letter post" out of a Malkin trade comment...Evgeni Malkin trade "rumor" and in the same sentence, in a two-sentence post, Simon getting a letter is pulled into it...that's therapist stuff haha
I'd let Simon stay if HCMS pinky promises not to put him on Sid's line.
That's from like a couple hours ago. Suck it.

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby mikey » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:39 pm

Also, does anyone know what’s going on with Jordy Bellerive? Not sure how much he has progressed this year
Doing well from what little I know (he's out in the Dub, which I don't really have the bandwidth for these days)...he's not a factor for the NHL squad next year...

nocera
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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby nocera » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:41 pm

I just realized I didn't see one Islanders fan say "Good series, Pens fans! You guys are going to be SCARY next year." Have they no decency?

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby meow » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:41 pm

Would y'all trade Kessel for Christian Fischer and 14th overall?
Yes

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby Trip McNeely » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:42 pm

Would y'all trade Kessel for Christian Fischer and 14th overall?
What is Fischer’s ceiling? I know he had a decent year.

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby MR25 » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:45 pm

He dropped off from last season though while still averaging a similar amount of ice time.

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby shafnutz05 » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:45 pm

I had to google BDSM.
This surprises me, given your interest in the human mind.

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby Dickie Dunn » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:46 pm

Also, does anyone know what’s going on with Jordy Bellerive? Not sure how much he has progressed this year
Doing well from what little I know (he's out in the Dub, which I don't really have the bandwidth for these days)...he's not a factor for the NHL squad next year...
Bellerive apparently played 3 games in WBS this season, which is probably news to everyone outside his family.

mikey, is there anyone in WBS that you consider a factor for the NHL squad next year? I know you're not big on Blueger (who's already here) or Lafferty, Samuel, based on the Zach Trotman Experience they seem to dislike Prow, Johnson could maybe be a 4th liner but who cares, Angello has impressive size but it's early in his career, early for Miletic as well. It just seems weird to have literally no one in the AHL to give a damn about. Maybe Riikola depending on how the offseason shake up turns out?

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby Lemon Berry Lobster » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:48 pm

Would y'all trade Kessel for Christian Fischer and 14th overall?
Don't be bringing that HF filth here...

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby crusherstasiak » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:48 pm

i'm still abuzz that pens floatsam tom kuhnhackl looked better than any pens forward

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby mikey » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:49 pm

Would y'all trade Kessel for Christian Fischer and 14th overall?
What is Fischer’s ceiling? I know he had a decent year.
Likely a bottom six, power winger...I don't know, like better Kuhnhackl, worse Winnik...something like that...

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby Dickie Dunn » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:50 pm

i'm still abuzz that pens floatsam tom kuhnhackl looked better than any pens forward
Best German in Penguins history. Should have kept him.

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby mikey » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:51 pm

Also, does anyone know what’s going on with Jordy Bellerive? Not sure how much he has progressed this year
Doing well from what little I know (he's out in the Dub, which I don't really have the bandwidth for these days)...he's not a factor for the NHL squad next year...
Bellerive apparently played 3 games in WBS this season, which is probably news to everyone outside his family.

mikey, is there anyone in WBS that you consider a factor for the NHL squad next year? I know you're not big on Blueger (who's already here) or Lafferty, Samuel, based on the Zach Trotman Experience they seem to dislike Prow, Johnson could maybe be a 4th liner but who cares, Angello has impressive size but it's early in his career, early for Miletic as well. It just seems weird to have literally no one in the AHL to give a damn about. Maybe Riikola depending on how the offseason shake up turns out?
Meh, not really...I don't really follow them that closely to be honest...long shot: Addison. Not really anyone that I think can start next year...

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby Beveridge » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:52 pm

Pens haven't won the cup since the board broke and we had to use Prosilver and didn't put up banner gifs for the playoff rounds.

Fix that and win the cup.

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby Lemon Berry Lobster » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:52 pm

Addison will be back in the WHL next year.

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2019 Penguins Offseason/Draft Thread

Postby mikey » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:53 pm

Would y'all trade Kessel for Christian Fischer and 14th overall?
Don't be bringing that HF filth here...
Is this a thing? I think Arizona and Kessel make some sense actually...

My question is more: do we think picks are a reasonable return for some assets? I'm not so sure GMJR sees it that way...that guy can't buy green bananas, I can't imagine him moving Maatta for a 2nd and a 4th...

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