2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Welcome back, Ovi
Seeking playoff record, yeah?
Round 2 runner-up
Seeking playoff record, yeah?
Round 2 runner-up
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2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Third year in a row
Why don’t you raise a banner
For reaching round 2?
Gambler’s fallacy
It’s known as a fallacy
Because it’s, like, false
Where you get this crap?
“Caps are due to beat the Pens!”
Really, why *this* year?
This year’s different?
Do you really believe that?
Nah, didn’t think so.
Why don’t you raise a banner
For reaching round 2?
Gambler’s fallacy
It’s known as a fallacy
Because it’s, like, false
Where you get this crap?
“Caps are due to beat the Pens!”
Really, why *this* year?
This year’s different?
Do you really believe that?
Nah, didn’t think so.
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2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Caps are due to win
Statistically, that means sht
Break their hearts again
Statistically, that means sht
Break their hearts again
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Sorry, there, Brooksy
Like Hossa, went to wrong team
Grass greener right here
Like Hossa, went to wrong team
Grass greener right here
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Sorry, there, Nisky
Like Brooksy, went to wrong team
Grass greener right here
Like Brooksy, went to wrong team
Grass greener right here
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2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Sorry, there, Nisky
Like Brooksy, went to wrong team
Grass greener right here
Like Brooksy, went to wrong team
Grass greener right here
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2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Sorry, there, Nisky
Like Brooksy, went to wrong team
Grass greener right here
Like Brooksy, went to wrong team
Grass greener right here
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Commander Buttsludge
Yes, could refer to all Caps
Wilson, though, is it
Yes, could refer to all Caps
Wilson, though, is it
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Flapping small girl arms
Testament to eunuchdom
Sid's dodint Backstrom
Testament to eunuchdom
Sid's dodint Backstrom
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2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
17 seconds
The horn! Siren! And light show!
Gotta play 60
Horny, Sid, and Jake
They weren't going to lose this
Check out their faces
Horny was like, "Grrr"
"Let's f'n go, you bastards!
Glorious bastards!"
Then Sid was all, "****.
It's time to get in the game.
Let's wake the hell up!"
Finally, Jakey
With unbridled glee, he beams
"I'm Scorgoalio!"
The Red Rawkers leave
Dejected, discomfited
It's hard to buy in
Rawkers, don't bother
Take the rest of the week off
Avoid the sadness
Or don't, because lulz
We're at the gallery steps
Chanting, "Let's go, Pens!"
You want to start fights
But, why? You're in Chinatown
Go get some dim sum
A 6 of Tsingtao
Will start drowning your sorrows
This round's on the Pens
The horn! Siren! And light show!
Gotta play 60
Horny, Sid, and Jake
They weren't going to lose this
Check out their faces
Horny was like, "Grrr"
"Let's f'n go, you bastards!
Glorious bastards!"
Then Sid was all, "****.
It's time to get in the game.
Let's wake the hell up!"
Finally, Jakey
With unbridled glee, he beams
"I'm Scorgoalio!"
The Red Rawkers leave
Dejected, discomfited
It's hard to buy in
Rawkers, don't bother
Take the rest of the week off
Avoid the sadness
Or don't, because lulz
We're at the gallery steps
Chanting, "Let's go, Pens!"
You want to start fights
But, why? You're in Chinatown
Go get some dim sum
A 6 of Tsingtao
Will start drowning your sorrows
This round's on the Pens
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
BC eloquence
Better than all media
READ ALL ABOUT IT!
Better than all media
READ ALL ABOUT IT!
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Stone Cold Game 1, man
Pens drop Stunner on DC
Crosby 3:16
Pens drop Stunner on DC
Crosby 3:16
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2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
The capitals are bedwetters
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2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Thanks, Robot B9BC eloquence
Better than all media
READ ALL ABOUT IT!
Haiku keeps me from stressing
At least for a while
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Tom Wilson, villain
Huckleberry chode smoker
Watch your back next game
Huckleberry chode smoker
Watch your back next game
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2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Caps looked frustrated
It's only game 1, idjits
It's gonna get worse
Sunday will be lit
Caps treating it as must-win
Well, it kinda is
Except Caps won't win
They'll enter game 3 down 2
Finish them off, Pens!
Pens have a cheat code
"Controller disconnected"
Caps defense will wilt
It's only game 1, idjits
It's gonna get worse
Sunday will be lit
Caps treating it as must-win
Well, it kinda is
Except Caps won't win
They'll enter game 3 down 2
Finish them off, Pens!
Pens have a cheat code
"Controller disconnected"
Caps defense will wilt
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Oh hai, Jay Beagle!
Say, great faceoffs in game 1
Aaron Asham punch
Say, great faceoffs in game 1
Aaron Asham punch
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Hmmm, Brett Connolly
Could have tied it up at end
Got his ass Murrayed
Could have tied it up at end
Got his ass Murrayed
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Alex Ovechkin
Missed wide open scoring chance
That is what she said
Missed wide open scoring chance
That is what she said
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Blech, Yuck, Nick Backstrom
Countenance makes people wretch
What's so special, brah?
Countenance makes people wretch
What's so special, brah?
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
TJ Oshie, no
Not shootout competition
BJ and The Bear
Not shootout competition
BJ and The Bear
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Kuznetsov scored first
Guentzel scored last, didn't he?
Jake won that, dooshbrain
Guentzel scored last, didn't he?
Jake won that, dooshbrain
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Wilson is fungus
Disgusting, nauseating
Petry dish of fail
Disgusting, nauseating
Petry dish of fail
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Dmitry Orlov
Plays on d, wears number 9
Boring, makes me sleep
Plays on d, wears number 9
Boring, makes me sleep
2018 Playoff Haikus - Round 2 vs. Caps
Who's Michal Kempny?
Odd sequence of consonants
Great claim to fame, dude
Odd sequence of consonants
Great claim to fame, dude
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